What I have learned from pop culture is people seem to lose their sense of self respect for money and fame. I think with popular onset of reality shows, they have somehow increased the low levels of stardom people are willing to subject themselves too. Yes greedy opportunistic people have been around forever but it just feels like nowadays with the all the social media outlets we are privy to people’s nonsense on another whole level. We are bombarded everyday through some form of media outlet about someone who is famous engaging in foolery, albeit sometimes entertaining foolery. I recently made a concrete decision to stop watching The Real Housewives of Atlanta, it was the only reality show I could tolerate. But now, after the whole debacle between Kenya and Portia, my minute ability to watch has completely dissolved. Watching beautiful black women act a fool no longer entertains me, and I don’t think putting people in the hospital is funny. Pop culture can unknowingly impact a person’s psyche so I have learned to take everything I see and hear with a grain of salt.
I don’t have an affinity for any kind of software so instead I will share with you my infinite desires of ECO gel. If you are natural I suggest ECO gel be a staple in your harem of hair supplies. Remember back in the day when all the gels would crack and dry looking like dandruff or worse boogers because of the that horrid black gel. Well those days are behind us ladies, now we can enjoy gel without the perils of flakes. ECO gel works good! I use it for me twist outs mixed with some kind of natural care cream and the results are delightful. I I have used it to slick down my parts in the front which is no easy feat depending on thickness of hair. ECO gel can be found in most hair stores, drug stores, Target and Walmart. Its inexpensive and lasts long, Trust me, you won’t be disappointed.
I cannot actually remember the first time I heard about Facebook rather I remember one of my first encounters with it. I was 25 and working as a Residential Counselor for Upward Bound at Rutgers University. Some fellow counselors and I were in the computer lab on a break. I would say at least three of them were on the internet looking at their Facebook pages. I was completely uninterested so much to the point I forgot about an account I had made under a hotmail account. I did not bother with Facebook until 2007. I created a new account with yahoo.
During this time I had just broken up with some friends and trying to solidify a life in the District of Columbia without them, needless to say it was a rough time. I did not have any pictures and definitely didn’t have any friends. I hated Facebook and had no use for it. Fast forward maybe a year or two my social life hit an incredible upswing. I was going out and making new friends having a ball. All that went on Facebook. I had a jerk back in 2007 who told me to get a life because I had commented on a mutual friend’s page about his lack of photos. The disparaging comment in hindsight, I believe motivated me to move on. Thank you jerk off, not only did I get a life but I am so enamored with my Facebook page, I’m borderline narcissistic. Whenever I’m feeling a little down or lonely, or less accomplished I do a quick browse through my photos and instantly reminded of how awesome I am. I made some really good memories with people I enjoyed. Facebook has now become a constant companion. I try to keep my sad posts to a minimum but who doesn’t have a bad day? I am very mindful of the friends I add to my page and a lot of people I have never met in person are some of the best people in the world. Always there to give me encouragement. I appreciate Facebook for giving me a platform to express myself through my blog, to keep tabs on all my friends and family members who are stretched across the country, and it keeps me informed on what’s going on in the world. I like being able to size up a guy by his Facebook page. I like to stalk too lol. In a nutshell my social life thrives on its existence.
I don’t have a business to complain about personally but I do have some music industry complaints. My blog was created out of the love for neo soul music. I know some people think it’s hokey and neo soul music is played out but it’s not. There is a whole wide world of great artist and musicians who are very talented providing positive music. I wish these particular artists would get more notice and become the norm versus the opposite of what we are witnessing in current day music. I tell people all the time good music is still being made but you might not hear it unless you have XM radio. I also find it strange how when neo soul was becoming mainstream and everybody was obsessed with Jilly from Philly, Musiq, India Arie, Glenn Lewis, Kindred the Family…etc….why those particular artist started to phase out. I for one was all on board for a musical revolution, a new revelation. I’m not sure what type of r&b took its place but I do know hip hop was going down a single tracked road and the golden age of hip hop as some of us like to refer to was dwindling slowly to its enviable demise. It is annoying to think how many people have access to regular radio but we are at the mercy of the people who think they know what we want to hear. According to mainstream America everyone wants to hear Lil Wayne ten times a day and that simply is not the case. I will say living in the District of Columbia I have access to two radio stations that play current neo soul, and old school r&b, but not every urban area across the country has the same luxury. My best defense against poor music is to give people options. My hope is to garner as much recognition as possible for people who believe in good music. Don not give up on good music it still exists and if you need some guidance check out my blog. (Insert shameless plug).
The best advice I ever received was success is the best revenge. I struggled a great deal throughout all my years of school and I was often belittled and talked down to as a result. Even as an adult going to college I never felt I measured up. I know it sounds incredibly cliché but I also adhere to the old adage let them haters be your motivators. I can recall several accounts when someone has tried to put me down only for me to turn around and do something great(like graduate from college, twice). Some of my “friends” I went to high school with were shocked when they found out I was in college. I always wanted to attend an HBCU, and I wasn’t going to let anyone or anything deter from me going.
I know you should not care what people think about you, but in life you are going to encounter a lot of people posing to be confident when they are highly insecure. Insecure people will do anything to infringe on your rights to be great. They will befriend you just to see if they can tear you down. It is a hurtful process but when I had a real friend break it down to me I finally understood. One of the most effective ways to counteract what people say or do to you, is to pursue the hell out of your dreams, be secure, and work on peace of mind. Success is measured differently by each individual but once you achieve it and look back at the people who never thought you were good enough, you will have won.
1. Mentor- Find someone who has been to college and lived the entire experience. College can be extremely daunting for those who are first generation students. So many decisions to make concerning a could be life altering experience. You need someone who is going to sit you down . Someone who will dispel honesty about the issues you may encounter and how to handle them effectively.
2. Research- Do your research on the colleges you are most interested in attending. I would suggests narrowing down your options even to locations. I would also suggest for those who might be weary of moving away from family to consider a two year school. Getting your feet wet in a two year school will prepare you for the sense of alternating schedules, the new feel of freedom, buying books, and standing in long lines.
3.Scholarships- I was not well versed on the on concept of searching for scholarships but nowadays you can do a Google search and a plethora of different scholarships are awarded to people, even down to people who are left handed. Find as many scholarships as you can and apply to as many as you can. Nothing bad will come of applying to multiple scholarships, only good. I was awarded a scholarship to waiver my out of state tuition fees. Every bit counts.
4. Campus Tours- All colleges are available to conduct tours. It is imperative if you can to get a feel for a college campus especially if you have never stepped foot on a large university. I attended small HBCU’s in undergrad so when I was accepted to the University Houston I was immediately intimidated. But once you get the hang of it and meet people who are just as lost, knowing your way around campus becomes like second like nature.
5. Financial Aid- Familiarize yourself with the ins and outs of how you plan to financially secure the duration of your time in school . You might be one of the few who is allotted a free ride for your entire college career, but most of us will not have the luxury. The financial aid office is the most stressful office on campus. But if you arm yourself with knowledge beforehand, take all the classes and seminars offered, the anxiety will decrease immensely.
*Bonus / Attitude- Your attitude toward the experience will also play a large role in how you successful your experience will be. I know after my first round in the financial aid office after standing in line for centuries, I felt defeated. Once I got through the all the red tape, I still knew in my heart I wanted to attend college and a bad day trying to register was not going to stop me. Have a positive mindset and you will graduate.
I have taken to the liberty to “borrow” some really great quotes from the The Writer Circles Facebook page. They focus on encouraging writers to write but feel free to interchange writing for whatever creative endeavor has special meaning to you. Let me also share my all time favorite quote, ” Life is a journey not a destination.”